how to text your crush without being boring

The 11 top do and don’ts of keeping your crush hooked

Nowadays texting is a big part of the dating ritual. This is especially true if you use dating apps, you simply have to text. If you are texting someone you like, you want to keep those texts flowing and you want to be interesting and funny. Thus arise the modern-day all-consuming question about how to text your crush without being boring.

I’m here to help, let’s mesmerize our crushes with our enigmatic fun-loving personalities.

1. There is no such thing as being boring

The first step to becoming a more fun texter is to become a bit more confident. To be able to be fun and interesting over text, you have to take risks and those risks will not always pay off.

Some people nowadays put too much weight on texting.

So, I want to start this article by saying that no single text will decide the course of the budding relationship with your crush.

What we feel when we receive a text has a lot to do whit how we feel about the person. Thus a “boring” text from the right person can brighten our whole day.

Be confident

People also don’t find the same things funny or entertaining, one person’s boring is another person’s version of heaven.

But you do have to text with a certain amount of coolness if you want to come across as interesting. Don’t be too attached to the outcome.  

Having this little disclaimer out of the way, let’s look for some ways how to text your crush without being boring.

Texting is about showing your true quirky personality without being afraid of rejection.

2. Have an interesting life

The second most important point when you ask how to text your crush without being boring is to have a fun and stimulating life that you are passionate about.

There is no way around this simple point, you cannot easily fake being an interesting person. It’s much easier to just be an interesting person. If you are, this will naturally come across when you text. Don’t be afraid to show your crush what it is that makes you unique compared to other people.

Bring passion to your life

Your exact interests and passions don’t matter, it’s all about how excited you are about the different parts of your life.

When you want to be a mysterious interesting person another pro tip is to have opposite sides included in your life. For example, be both deep and funny.

Embraces the different sides of your personality in your life as well as when you text. Ask your crush a deep question one day and send them a funny video the next. It’s your ability to mix things up that makes your texts entertaining.

Text when you feel your best

The best time to text is when you are doing something interesting or when you had an interesting insight. Tell your crush about your experience or your idea and why this makes you excited.

For example, text when you are about to have your first skateboard lesson, or just when you have come back from a comedy show, or when you have finished reading a great book.

3. Keep it casual

Texting should foremost be a tool you use for practical reasons. As a general rule only text if you have a clear goal in mind.

The goal can be to get to know the other person better, that’s still a goal and it should give your texts enough focus.

For example; I was just wondering how you feel about horror movies?

Or; Do you have any strange things you strongly dislike?

Or, What was a big thing about your childhood that impacts how you are today?

Take a moment to think about the things you do want to find out about him, formulate a couple of questions and send one of them and see how it goes.

A guy who likes you will like your texts

For most guys, in most situations, less is more when it comes to text. Fewer text messages create more mystery.

Although I have to say that the big exception to this is when a guy is totally smitten by a girl, that can turn any guy into a texting maverick.

Don’t keep updating your crush about your day-to-day life. But do throw out a couple of interesting questions to deepen the relationship.

4. Ask interesting questions

This brings me to my next point. A text conversation can only be as interesting as the questions you ask. This is absolutely crucial when you ask how to text your crush without being boring

You might already be an interesting person (I’m sure you are) but a simple “How are you?” for the 5^th time, will not create fireworks. Neither will “How was your day?”

(Those text messages are sweet if you already are in a relationship.)

When you want to make your crush fall hard, you have to be more creative and more unpredictable. Sometimes you ask questions, other times you can share something interesting with your crush.

Check out our article Is it good to be mysterious in a relationship for some more ideas on how to bring the right kind of drama.

Examples of interesting questions

What book or movie changed your life the most?

Or, what was the best decision you ever made?

Also try; What is your favorite childhood memory?

What has been inspiring you a lot lately?

Open-ended questions

Make sure that it’s not possible to answer your questions with a yes or no.

You asking interesting questions should be around 30 percent of the text messages. Ideally, those questions should lead to fun, bantering discussions where the two of you actually get to know each other better.

When you ask deep interesting questions you also show your desire to want to get to know him better. You want to get to know the real him.

5. Do show your interest

If you like the guy and are excited about him, there is nothing wrong with letting him know how you feel. (If that scares him off, he is simply not the right guy.)

Those kinds of text messages can create a lot of attraction and anticipation. Life is supposed to be fun and you are down for the ride.

As a general rule, people like the people who like them. Your text messages should be 20 percent reinforcing that you are excited about him being in your life.

Examples to get your creative juices flowing

Really looking forward to seeing you this weekend.

I’m excited about our big movie-marathon date.

Can’t wait to try some wine together with you.

I really enjoyed the other night. (You can be specific about exactly what you enjoyed.)

Talking to you always makes me smile.

Your texts are the funniest.

This made me think about you. (This is a great starting point for an interesting text conversation. Anything can make you think about him. Do share. It can be a song or a poem or a book. He will be interested to know why it made you think about him.)

The thing I like about you is that… (Yes, tell him what it is you like about him.)

I like getting to know you, it’s a lot of fun.

I always have so much fun when I spend time with you, I don’t know how you do it 😉

6. Add a sprinkle of sensuality

When it comes to sexuality, a text message is an excellent opportunity to be a bit brave and vulnerable and build excitement. Text messages can be a surprisingly safe way to let him know that you are attracted to him.

Most men love sex, and they love to think about sex and talk about sex. They also want nothing more than to be desirable by the woman they like.

To get lots of ideas about what to write, check out my guide; How to turn a guy on over text.

Don’t fear rejection

If you don’t get the response you were looking for, don’t freak out. To be able to create excitement with the right man, you have to be comfortable with rejection. To create attraction, you have to take risks.

You definitely should make sensual texting 10 percent of your texting. You have to let him know that you are a sensual being that finds him sexually attracted.  

Adding a healthy dose of sexuality to your messages is a very effective way to text your crush without being boring.

Examples of sensual texts

I keep thinking about your eyes. (Or hands, or voice, just pick whatever you like about him.)

If he sends you a picture of something (like his dog,) you can reply; I would have liked the picture better if you were in it.

The way you (make pasta for example) makes me excited. (Pick something he is doing, it can also be the way he argues for his standpoint.) You can also use the phrase “Turns me on.” Watching you repair things turns me on.

Reflect on him and his effect on you

The great thing about sensual texting is that it forces you to think about the things that are unique about him and in what ways those things do turn you on. You connect with your own sexuality and that’s always a good thing.

If you are brave you can also ask him about what he likes. Forcing men to think about sex and sensual things are always a good idea.

What turns you on?

What’s your favorite part of me?

What makes you excited?

What’s a secret thing that turns you on that you never told anyone about?

Do you have any kinks I need to know about?

7. Be unpredictable

We get more addicted to unpredictable behavior (That’s why some people love slot machines.)

Use this knowledge to your advantage by always mixing up your texting habits. Send long texts sometimes and other times short fun ones.

Be deep and serious sometimes and playful and lighthearted other times.

Mix things up

Texting is a great way to show the different sides of your personality. I’m sure you have different sides to you, but a lot of us are only used to showing one side. Challenge yourself to be braver and more original.

You can also text at different random times. Don’t adhere to a texting schedule, be completely unpredictable. If he never knows what to expect from you, he will become hooked.  

8. Know when to stop

If your crush only responds with two-word sentences, it’s time for you to stop sending messages. Some people simply are not big on text messages.

Or maybe your crush is busy. As the saying goes; don’t try to beat a dead horse. Nowhere is this truer than when it comes to text conversations.

Flirty fun messages that build sexual tension are a two-way street. If you don’t get flirty fun messages back, just take a break.

Stop when things are going great

You can also stop when things are flowing. Just say something like “Got to go, nice talking with you.” This is an excellent way to mix things up and be unpredictable.

Leaving your crush hanging actually makes your text conversations more dynamic and interesting. You have a bigger chance of building sexual tension if you don’t over-invest in every text conversation.

Don’t be afraid to stop even if things are going well.

9. Use humor

This point on how the text your crush without being boring could have been on top of the list. But as they say; better late than never. Humor is a vital part of keeping your texts interesting. To increase your general sense of humor I recommend watching standup comedy. Also, reflect on what makes the comedian funny.

Make fun of yourself

One part of being funny is self-depraving humor. You make fun of your personality and your shortcomings. Don’t be too negative, otherwise, this is an excellent way to make someone like you. We do like it when people are vulnerable and show us who they really are. If they can do it in a fun way, even better.

Banter

Banter is an important part of flirting. Disagree playfully with something he says. Call him out if you think he is wrong about something. State your opinions, even if they are different from his. You don’t have to disagree for real, you just have to pretend to disagree.

Do all of the above with a twinkle in your eye.

Make fun of him

Another part of using humor is to tease the guy in question. Put him in a stereotype. Playfully mock things that he does. Yes, it is a fine line you have to balance. But when done right, it is very alluring. Check out my article How to tease your crush.

The best way to tease a guy is when you make fun of him and at the same time compliment his manliness.

For example, I can tell you spend too much time at the gym.

You can also “misunderstand” something he says as more sexual than he intended. This way you bring both humor and sensualism into the conversation. Playfully tell him off.

Don’t be negative

It’s important that you put a positive spin on everything above. It’s supposed to be funny, not hurtful.

10. Don’t text when you are bored

If you are bored and that’s the reason why you are texting, your texts will indeed come across as boring.

Your crush shouldn’t be the source of fun and excitement in your life.

Many people make this mistake, I get it, crushing on someone is in itself exciting. It’s the rollercoaster of possibilities.

But guys have a sixth sense telling them when a girl uses them to make her life more interesting. We all want someone who is going to contribute to our life, not make us responsible for them.

Question your motive

Before you text your crush, take a moment and question your underlying intention. What are you trying to achieve?

If you are looking for excitement, step away from those letters and challenge yourself to find that excitement somewhere else. You are responsible for your life and for your well-being. Don’t outsource that power, it’s the most important thing you have.

If you follow this rule your texting game will improve a lot.

Text when you already have excitement going on and you are excited to share that feeling with your crush.

11. Don’t text looking for reassurance from your crush

I get it, you want to check in and see if the spark is there.

You want that message that proves your crush is still interested.

This unfortunately is the worst time to text if you want to keep things interesting. People can always sense when you have an alternate agenda. Guys can usually also sense when you are trying to “get them.”

Instead, give yourself reassurance. If this guy is the right guy for you, he will appreciate your texts. He will think you are funny and interesting.

Step away from those letters and bring fun and adventure to your own life.

A Final Note

How to text your crush without being boring is all about mixing it up. It’s also about showing him who you really are and being proud of yourself. Keep having fun and your texts will be fun as a result. The right guy will love them.