People Come Into Your Life For A Reason: Recognizing The Signs Of A Positive Impact

Plus the best tips on how to deal with toxic people

It’s true that people come into your life for a reason. Everyone that enters your life in any significant way, has an important lesson to teach you.

This new person will show you your pain point and also offer up the path to healing. People also come into your life to inspire you and to lead the way for you to make the right decisions.

Negative Impact

Now it’s time for a word of caution. Not everyone that comes into your life will have a positive impact. The reason behind this is that the relationship we have with people reflects the relationship we have with ourselves.

People can also enter our lives only to make us repeat negative patterns from our childhood.

Trauma reappearing

To explain this point, let me give you an example; if you had an absent parent (maybe just emotionally absent) you’ve learned to associate love with a person being absent.

So, when someone comes along and mirrors how your parent used to treat you, there is a risk that you become infatuated with this person. Your subconscious mistake their bad behavior for love

This is why people with a traumatic childhood often end up in destructive relationships as an adult.

Familiarity is attractive

If you recognize yourself in this, yes, this person came into your life for a reason. You invited him because he felt familiar to you. His behavior spoke to your subconscious.

The people that come into our lives are signposts that’s telling us what’s going on in our inner world.

Breaking the pattern

Now that you know why we sometimes get stuck in negative patterns; inviting the wrong people into our lives, you are more likely to be able to break the destructive pattern.

You heal yourself by developing a strong and loving relationship with yourself.

How to love yourself

Take care of yourself, and don’t allow negative self-talk. A negative inner monologue is among the worst thing you can do to yourself.

Start journaling and meditating. Treat yourself as you would treat your dearest friend. Give yourself the attention you wish you would get from other people.

We will circle back to a negative impact but let’s first take a look at how to recognize when someone comes into your life for a reason and that reason is to help you.

People Come Into Your Life for a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime? – Learn to separate the difference

For a reason

Some people enter your life and then they are gone just as fast. You might miss their presence and feel like you lost them too soon. But they came to teach you a lesson or to show you a part of yourself that you had overlooked. Or to inspire you to change your career.

When they had fulfilled their mission, they once again diapered. If you learn to recognize why they came into your life, you will have an easier time letting go.

For a season

Most people fall under this category. They come into your life to share a part of this path that is our life. Sometimes this season extends for years, other times it’s just a season.

Whatever the duration of their stay, they will teach you a lot of lessons.

There is not only one reason why they came into your life, but several. Once you see them all, you will be grateful for this person and the things you shared.

Be a positive presence in their life

You might wonder how to repay the service and have a positive impact on their life. Read my article Being There For Someone In A Time Of Need – 11 Meaningful Ways.

For a lifetime

This is the hardest reason to identify. Few people fit into this category; we often want to keep people for a longer time than is necessary. Humans have a hard time letting go.

But don’t get stuck in relationships that have run their course, remember, most people come into your life for a season rather than a lifetime.

3 top Signs that someone come into your life for a positive reason

1. The person treats you with respect

A person that comes into your life to teach you a valuable lesson is distinguished by their ability to treat you with kindness. You feel respected. Their behavior is consistent. On the flip side, people who go hot and cold are not in your life for the right reason.

Don’t keep them for a season, they are not worth the headache.

2. You feel seen and heard

When a person enters your life and is destined to make a positive impact, you can tell by how you feel in their presence. You should feel like they see the real you and that they appreciate you for who you are.

3. You feel energized

We can tell a lot about a person by how we feel when we have spent time with them. If you feel insecure, triggered, and drained of energy, this person doesn’t belong in your life.

People who come into your life for a pure reason should leave you feeling good about yourself.

If you are looking to get inspired and find your fighting spirit, check out my article Reassuring Words For The Future – How To Look Ahead and Become Inspired Again.

Learning a tough lesson from toxic people

Even the people who have hurt you the most have a valuable lesson for you. When we regard them this way, the pain they cause become a little bit easier to carry.

The more meaning you can find in your painful interactions, the more likely you are to grow as a person.

Post-traumatic growth

Making sense of the people that come into our lives to wreak havoc will help us process our grief.

This is the most important step to healing.

If you don’t do this properly, bitterness and doubt will engulf you.

Ask yourself how this person made you stronger

What did you learn about your boundaries as a result of this painful interaction? How did this person help you get to know yourself?

In what ways did you manage to stand up for yourself, despite that it was hard?

Journal about your answers to those questions and even a toxic person will have a positive impact on your life.

A Final Note

When people come into your life, reflect on if you think they are there for a reason, a season, or a lifetime? Which lesson do you think this specific person has come to teach you?

Some people teach you the lesson of what you don’t want and the things that are not acceptable to you.

Some people are inspiring and valuable enough that you want to keep them for a lifetime.