How to turn a guy on over text

12 strategies to make him crave you

Getting a guy hot and horny over text is fun and exciting. You can explore your likes and fantasies together. Take my 12 strategies on how to turn a guy on over text and put your own spin on them.

Getting a guy excited is all about exploring your own sexuality and what turns you on.

It has to be the right guy

If you don’t get the response you are looking for, don’t push it. Maybe the guy in question is busy with work or other obligations. You never know exactly what’s going on in another person’s life. Sexting is a two-way street.

On top of that, some people are shy and not used to expressing their desire. Start slow.

1. Use sexually charged language

Some words are more sexually charged than others. Being aware of these words and using them will allow you to turn on a guy, even if you don’t know him especially well.

Examples of those words are; excitement, hard, wet, warm, fantasy, wild, deep, intimate, orgasmic, turned on, scream, moan, strong, slow, and pleasure.

I’m sure you can come up with some good examples of sexually charged words yourself. Just think about what words make you think about sex.

You can take those words and use them in normal sentences. The guy’s subconscious will absolutely pick up on your sensual signals.

Examples of sexually charged texts

I got caught in the rain and now I’m all wet. I need a warm towel and your strong hands to get dry again.

I’m going to take a long hot shower.

I’m all sweaty from my Pilates class. The teacher made us work hard today.

The new class I’m taking is particularly hard. Did I say hard? I meant difficult. You must be on my mind.

I just had a steak that was almost as good as you know what.

What’s your favorite position?

The deserts at this new restaurant are better than an orgasm, you can have your pick next time we are there.

You can decide, I trust your opinions, in all areas of life 😉

You know what you are doing, I can tell you are a man of many talents.

2. Ask him what he likes

Everyone likes to talk about themselves. We feel good when someone is genuinely interested in who we are.

If someone is interested in us as sexual beings, this is in itself exciting.

Ask him what turns him on or ask him what he finds sexy.

Make him reflect on sex.

When he is forced to reflect on those sorts of questions he will naturally become turned on. You turn on a guy by making him think about sex, it is really that simple.

Make him think about what turns him on

Making him think about sex is something you can easily do over text. You can start slow by asking him why he became interested in you, to begin with. What caught his attention?

If he replies with the same question, this is an excellent opportunity to answer with the charged language I mentioned above. His strong arms and sexy eyes caught your attention.

You can also compliment him on something connected to his masculinity. Make sure he knows it was his strong sexual pull on you that made you fall for him or become interested in him.

Find out his deepest desires

When you know him a bit better, ask him about his secret fantasies

Most guys have sexual fantasies. Go ahead and ask a lot of questions about this. You can also ask what his favorite sexual memory with you is. Or what he is dreaming about doing with you. Those kinds of questions are how you use text messages to turn a guy on.

For more tips read our article How to create sexual tension with a man.

3. Ask the right sexy questions

If you haven’t caught it by now, flirty exciting texts are all about questions and answering those questions.

You can start slowly and get his permission by asking him one of the questions below.

Want to know what I’m wearing?

Want to know what I’m doing?

Want to know one of my secret fantasies?

Want to know what part of you is my favorite?

Ask about him

When you have told him the answer, do follow up and ask what he would like to do. Don’t be afraid to ask what he is wearing. Or just be discreet and ask what is his favorite thing to wear. He might answer nothing 😉

Use the new information in the next text conversation

If you don’t ask questions, you risk the conversation dying out. By asking the right question you also find out a lot of secret information about him that you can use next time you want to turn him on over text.

When you know more about his secret likes, use that information the next time you are sexting. For example; I like the idea of you coming on my breast. (If he mentioned before that he likes your breast.)

Sexting is all about call-back references.

Of course, also stay true to your own sexuality.

Use the new information in reality

Also deliver on what you have been talking about the next time you meet him. If you promised a long blow job, go ahead and give him exactly that. By doing this, your ability to turn him on over text also manifests in reality. He will be even more turned on next time he receives a sexy text from you.

By texting about sex you find out more about his secret fantasies, use this information shamelessly. You will be able to turn him on as no one has ever done before.

Most men are surprisingly open when it comes to talking about what they like. Remember, he wants you to know about his unique preferences. This is the best way to turn a guy on over text.

4. Connect with your sexuality

As a general rule, nothing turns a man on more than knowing that you are turned on.

Do let him know how you feel. If he makes you wet and horny, go ahead and tell him this.

You can be as vague or as direct as you want.

If you don’t want to be explicit, you can be coy and teasing and let him fill in the missing information. Tell him that you are thinking about him but that you won’t say exactly what you are thinking.

Tell him something along the line that you look forward to being in his arm or kissing him. He will fill in the blanks.

Make sure you tell him you enjoy his body, everybody likes to hear that. Tell him he makes you feel safe.

Tell him what you genuinely feel

The bottom line is that the more you connect with your sexuality, the more sensual thoughts you have to share with him.

Explore your own sexuality by watching exciting movies or reading erotic literature. Do let him know what you are up to over text.

Spend quality time with yourself

You can also have a nice erotic self-care routine such as long baths while you listen to sensual music. Do tell him how much you enjoy being alone in a warm bath (or shower).

Telling a guy what you are up to is a great way to turn him on over text.

You can for example just send him a picture of the erotic literature you are reading.

Him knowing that you have a sensual relationship with yourself will absolutely turn him on.

6. Give him a compliment

Yes, men also crave to be desired. Men also especially get turned on by feeling masculine. Turn a guy on over text by telling him what you find masculine about him.

Tell him what it is about him that makes you wet and horny.

If you just have started dating you can keep things more vanilla. Tell him you feel comfortable in his arms or that you liked the way he kissed you goodnight.

Tell him that feeling his body makes you excited for the next step.

Tailor the compliment to his uniqueness

We all want to be loved and desired for the unique qualities that make us the person we are.

Thus, if you really want to turn him on, give him a sexy compliment on something he is proud over. Or in some cases, something he is unsure about. Compliment his sexy legs or his sexy lips. Tell him that you get horny by looking into his eyes.

Or tell him that the way he handles his job meetings makes you weak in the knees. Also, tell him that you particularly like it when he comes back from the gym and why that side of him turns you on.

6. Describe something sensual

Lots of things can be sensual.

Making a cake or cooking a nice dinner can be sensual. Listening to a new album can be sensual. Shopping for a new cute outfit can be sensual. Being dirty after playing a sport can be sensual. Reading a book can be sensual.

Go ahead and tell him what you are up to. But try to make it more sensual by using charged language. You can tell him you find it sensual to make a risotto, or that working on perfecting your cupcake recipes makes you feel naughty since you have to lick the bowl.

Do come up with something that is genuine and authentic for who you are.

7. Send him the right picture

 A picture says more than a thousand words, so if you are prepared to send the guy a question a well-aimed picture, you have lots of options. A picture will turn on a guy because guys are normally very visual.

You can go as explicit as you feel comfortable with. Boob pictures make wonders for most guys.

The picture doesn’t have to be explicit to turn on a guy over text.

Send a cute picture

Also, remember that you can send a cute picture, but make the text more naughty. For example, send a picture of yourself and then write “You have no idea about the naughty thoughts I had going through my head at the moment.”

8. Bring out your submissive or dominating side

Most humans and particularly most guys like to play around with either submissive or dominating roles.

This is great to know when you want to know how to turn on a guy over text. These kinds of roleplays get more dynamic and therefore more exciting. You can have a lot of fun by, for example, pretending to be his slave or naughty secretary. Ask him what tasks he wants you to perform. Be as naughty or obedient as you want to be when it comes to obeying him.

When you do sexting with a guy, you don’t always need to be yourself, you can play around with different roles.

Ask him what he would like to do with you if he found you tied up in a dark room. You can also reference whips and other sex toys. Tell him about your favorite sex toy and exactly how you use it. Suggest different sex toys you can try next time you get together.

Try dominating him

It’s true that most men lean toward their dominating side, but since most men also love sex, they do love to be ordered around. It’s a turn-on for men with a woman who knows what she wants and like.

Tap into some of your preferences and ordered him to do some of the things you like. It can be pretty innocent, for example, demand him to send a picture when he is taking a shower after the gym.

You can also go full-on dominatrix and tell him that you are going to handcuff him and have your way with him. Tell him he will be punished for all his naughty thoughts.

9. Reference the past

Since we have a clear visual memory of the past, this is an easy channel to tap into when you want to turn on a guy.

If you are having sex with the guy in question, you should absolutely reference things you have done together and how they made you feel.

Tell him exactly what about those occasions turned you on.

The reference can be innocent and still turn him on

This can be done even if you had a non-sexual interaction. Just write; The coffee you made for me was really tasty, it makes me think you are good at other things as well.

Or, I can think of all sorts of situations when a strong body like yours would be useful.

Or, I want you to help me with certain things since you are so kind and generous.

10. Plan for the future

We all like to daydream about the future and the fun things we want to do in the future. That’s why people like to plan their vacations.

This goes for sex as well. Tell him about what you want to do with him.

For example, travel to the Maldives and take a night swim (naked) in the moonlight.

Or go for a road trip and find a private stop in the forest to put out a blanket and make love in nature.

This kind of text message requires you to actually think about what you would want to do with him, which is a good way to explore your own sexuality.

Use our five sense

Make sure you use all the senses when you describe scenes to him. We get turned on by smell and touch and taste. Speaking of that, do mention that you like the way he smells. You can tell him that the way he smells makes your heart melt. Tell him how good his kisses taste.

11. Switch things up

When it comes to how to turn guys on over text, it’s surprisingly similar to turning a guy on in real life.

You have to mix things up. Sometimes it’s nice to be quick and dirty, other times you want a long slow build-up to an explosive orgasm. By being unpredictable you will be able to turn him on even more.

Be creative and unpredictable

Don’t send the same text at the same time, every time. Instead, be completely random in the way you send him these texts. Make sure that you send different exciting messages every time.

Try sending sexy messages both when he is busy with other things as well as when he has plenty of free time. Send those messages in the morning as well as late in the evening. The more you manage to surprise him, the more turned on he will be.

Describe your sensations

Describe how he makes your body feel. Are you warm, wet, or tingly? Describe how it feels to be horny. Men get excited by being able to turn a woman on. He wants to know how he makes you feel.

We get more addicted to things that happened at random. Since we never know what kind of reward we are going to get, we always want more.

Get into tabu territory

If you are looking for even more naughty suggestions I recommend reading this guide on 13 things guys like in bed but won’t ask for.

Ask him which one of those he would want to try.

11. Tease him

When it comes to creating sexual chemistry with a guy, teasing is an excellent tool. You can check out our guide on How to tease your crush, and use some of those strategies in your texting.

Sexual teasing when it comes to turning on a guy, can be a lot of different things. It becomes easier the more you know the guy. Teasing is a bit tricky, since you have to walk the line between cruel and sweet.

Be cruel

An example is telling him that he can’t have what he wants. Or, that you have to go or that you are busy.

I bet you are horny now.

Are you hard yet?

What do I have to do to make you horny? When he answers, tell him that he hasn’t deserved it just yet.

Teasing a person is also about telling them who they are and what they like. To do this in a fun effective way, you do have to know the guy a bit. When he asks for something, playfully refuse to give him what he wants. Tell him that he has to work for it.

12. Be vocal

When you start out on your sexting adventure, be subtle. A little goes a long way in the beginning. But if you really want to turn a guy on over text, don’t be afraid to talk dirty and clearly express your most secret wishes.

Most men are very sexual creatures, and they have no problem with detailed descriptions of advanced sex scenes. If it makes you blush, it will turn him on.

Get hot and heavy

So the advanced course of sexting is to use all those words you have never used before. Make sure that you are turned on by what you are doing and it will come across as genuine and exciting.

A Final Note

Sexting is fun. To be able to turn a guy on over text messages makes you feel horny and powerful. It’s a good way to discover things about your own sexuality and those special interactions that excite you. Now go out and practice.