Am I overthinking or is he losing interest?

5 signs you are overthinking, 7 signs he is losing interest

Falling in love is a vulnerable experience. You get afraid and panicky and start thinking that your feelings are not reciprocated. Has he been acting distant? Or are you just in your head? No need to worry, in this article I will explain everything you need to know when you are wondering Am I overthinking or is he losing interest?

Including how to act if he is indeed losing interest, to optimize your chance of getting him back.

5 Signs you are just overthinking things; he still likes you

Let’s first get those dating nerves out of the picture. These 5 signs will tell you the truth, regardless if you just started dating or is already an established couple.

1. He has personal issues he is dealing with

Has there been a death in his family? Is his work situation particularly bad and stressful? Does he feel inadequate in any way? Maybe a stretch of unemployment, or just the fear of unemployment?

Has he gained weight or is he struggling with any health issues?

If yes, you are overthinking.

Natural up and downs

Any relationship will go through different phases and a stressed-out guy will not be as present and romantic as he used to be.

Be kind and empathic, but also give him plenty of space to figure out his problem on his own. Trust that he is capable of taking care of whatever is going on, he will love you even more for trusting him and not putting pressure on him.

He will appreciate your support

When he comes out of the deep end, he will be grateful for how gracious you handled the situation.

Rember even small things can inflict your guy and make him be less of himself.

2. You have a tendency to overthink relationships

When you ask if you are overthinking or if he is indeed losing interest, this question has everything to do with you and your dating history.

You may see things that are not even there.

We regard reality through the lenses of our own fears and traumas, that is true for all of us.

Love makes you anxious

Be honest, have you been equally worried in your previous relationship?

Is this doubt something that often comes up for you?

If yes, you are overthinking the situation.

Heal yourself

Reach out to a friend and talk with them. Also, make sure that you listen to yourself; write down your thoughts and feelings.

The most important thing is that you question your stories. When you think he is less interested, that’s just a story you are telling yourself, it is not reality. Focus on the ways he does show you his interest.

Check out these 23 Clear & Sincere Signs He Doesn’t Want To Lose You.

3. He still looks at you with love and tenderness

You can tell a lot by the way a man looks at you. In fact, you should be able to tell if you are overthinking or if is he losing interest. Trust your intuition.

His eyes tell you everything he is not saying. If he seems to take pleasure from the simple act of looking at you, you are good. He still has strong feelings.

He looks at you when you don’t notice

If he is preoccupied, he might not look at you as often as before. But you should still be able to catch him glancing at you with love in his eyes.

Also, look him in his eyes and see how he reacts. When we are fond of someone, we like looking them in the eyes. We feel comfortable resting in their gaze.

4. You can tell he tries to make an effort

We all have problems and struggles, but what separates a good healthy relationship is the efforts we make in times of hardship.

Is he trying to spend time with you? And when he is spending time with you, is he trying to be present and active?

Does he try to improve himself in all areas of life?

Even his efforts to improve his life, are, in some senses. a proof of his love.

So if he working hard on a career transition, this actually means he does love you and he wants to be a better man because of you.

Love inspires us to achieve greatness

When we love someone we always want to come across as the best version of ourselves. We try to make an effort in all areas of our lives. Even when it is difficult.

If he tries to reassure you, either with words or by being physical such as hugs and handholding, this is a clear sign that you are just overthinking the situation.

Instigating sex is for some men a way to show their love, even when things are complicated.

5. When you ask for reassurance, he gives it to you

Regardless if you just started dating or have been together for 10 years, the healthy thing to do is to ask for reassurance.

Don’t get stuck in your own mind, asking yourself am I overthinking or is he losing interest?

Tell him that you are afraid that he is losing interest. Come clean and explain your feelings. Also, tell him that you need his verbal reassurance that he does indeed want to be with you.

We always assume that people know how to love us, or that they will intuitively feel when we need more closeness.

This is not always the case.

Ask for your needs to be met

Far from this, a healthy thriving relationship is built around expressing our feelings and asking for our needs to be met. If you need more quality time, do ask for exactly that. A man who is crazy about you will absolutely try to deliver.

He might have no idea that you are doubting him.

If he follows through and tries to change his behavior, this means that he wants the relationship to work. Simple as that.

Improve your self-esteem

If you feel insecure and doubt his love for you, I suggest using the tips and tricks in this article I have nothing to offer in a relationship -How to fix this mindset.

7 signs he is losing interest

So now that you know the signs that he is invested in the relationship, let’s take a look at some signs that he is indeed losing interest.

Just remember that these signs also can mean other things.

For example, he can be feeling insecure and thus act in a strange way.

The best way to get the amazing relationship you deserve is to communicate about your insecurities.

1. You only see him sporadically

How we spend our time is a telltale sign of where our heart is. Doing the things we love comes easily and naturally.

If you rarely see him, despite your efforts to organize dates, this is the top sign that no, you are not overthinking, he is losing interest.

Our words can be deceitful, but our actions usually show the truth.

2. He rarely instigates contact

Take a look at your chat history. Ask yourself how often he calls or texts. Also, ask yourself how often he suggests getting together.

A man who is smitten with you will want to spend time with you. He will also want to check in with you and make sure that you are doing fine.

If you feel like you are the only one that makes the relationship happens, he might not be so into you anymore.

3. He is not his usually charming self

When someone starts to lose interest, they subconsciously want to make you lose interest as well. To achieve this they start acting less and less charming. They might even be snappy or instigate unnecessary fights.

So if he is a far cry from the charismatic man you first meet, this is an indicator that his interest is dwindling.

He no longer tries to seduce you, in fact. He wants you to regard him as a bland and charmless person. This is a subtle strategy to get out of the relationship without having to flat-out reject you.

4. He refuses to talk about the future of the relationship

When we are in love and dedicated to someone, we are excited to talk about the future. In fact, that’s one of our favorite subjects.

We create a stronger bond by constantly planning for the future.

A man who has stopped mentioning the future is a man who has started imagining a future without you.

Bring up your summer holiday, or something equally fun, and see how he reacts.

Make him fall back in love with you

If you are in a relationship and you fear that he has fallen out of love with you. Don’t panic, since he was crazy about you in the beginning you absolutely have what it takes to make him yours again.

Check out my in-depth comprehensive guide; How to make someone fall back in love with you?

5. He stopped the process of getting to know you

When a man asks you questions, it is a strong indicator that he is romantically invested. The more questions, the stronger his feelings.

He is trying to find out what’s important to you so that he can impress you in the future. He is also getting a lot of enjoyment from the simple process of getting to know you.

He might ask simple questions about your favorite food or music, or he will ask deep questions about what makes you tick.

When a man stops asking questions, he is not feeling the love as strongly anymore.

It is indeed a sign that you are not overthinking, he losing interest.

6. He only seems to be interested in sex

I know this sucks to hear, but take a moment and think about the time you do spend together? What is your preferred activity?

Maybe he is just using you for sex.

If it feels like all your interactions lead the same way, you are correct in doubting his intentions.

He might not even be fully aware of what he is doing.

Stop giving him sex

If this is the case, stop handing out the sex. It doesn’t matter how often you’ve had sex with him in the past, you are always entitled to withdraw that part of the relationship.

Force him to treat you in a more romantic way, this technique might just work. It is worth a try, at least.

Don’t use sex as a tool to try and make him interested in you; play it the other way around.

7. There is more fighting in the relationship

One of the biggest signs of a relationship slowly deteriorating is that all sorts of fights are increasing. There might be more tense quietness, more passive-aggressive comments, and more disagreements over minor things.

Every form of tension is an indicator that things are left unsaid between the two of you.

He is mentally pushing you away

If your man (or date) always seems to be looking for ways to disagree, he wants to push you away.

One of the reasons for this can be that he is losing interest.

6 ways to make him interested again

Even if he is acting distant, it is not a sure sign that he is losing interest.

Many emotionally unavailable guys are very loving and enthusiastic at the beginning of a relationship, only to become distant when the situation triggers their fear of intimacy.

To find out more, read our article Confessions of an emotionally unavailable man.

Don’t jump to conclusions

He might just be scared of having a real relationship and real love. Because of this, you need to tread carefully.

You don’t know what’s going on.

In fact, you can never fully know.

We never know exactly what’s going on in the depths of another person. (Sometimes they don’t know themselves.)

Make him yours again

If he is acting distant, there are actually things you can do to optimize your chances that he will come around and start pursuing you again.

These strategies might not work, some relationships are not meant to be. Check out our article for all the different reasons why a man loses interest in our article When a guy acts interested then backs off – 11 top reasons why and how to react.

1. Strengthen your own identity

When we fall in love it easily happens that we forget about ourselves. We start being overly nice and overly accompanying to our partner.

The only problem is that this doormat of a woman was not who he fell in love with. (Harsh, I know.)

Who are you?

You are simply too nice, and as a result, his feelings for you start to dwindle.

Instead, get to know yourself by meditating and journaling. Focus on educating yourself and dedicate time to a new exercise regime.

2. Make fun plans for yourself

Time to find yourself again. Forget about his needs and put your focus back on your needs, your passions. Work on creating a fun exciting life for yourself.

This can include travel to somewhere exciting or making fun plans with your friends.

3. Be positive and easygoing when you do see him

When he does reach out and want to meet, instead of being resentful and critical, be chill and happy.

He will start wondering what’s going on.

You don’t need to talk about your new exciting life, your joy will shine through regardless.

4. Stop contacting him

To increase his attraction for you he needs to feel like he doesn’t have you. Men have a sixth sense for when you are emotionally theirs.

Rock his boat by stopping reaching out.

This will give him time to wonder what you are up to and hopefully, he starts missing you.

5. Give him the space he needs

The harder we try to clutch someone, the more that person wants to get away from us. Instead, let him free.

By being cold and distant, he is communicating that he needs space. Give him that space.

6. Stop mentally chasing him

Are you replaying all your most romantic dates? Are you shopping for a wedding dress or planning romantic getaways?

That daydreaming got to go.

His subconscious can sense that you are overly attached, and that scares him. He doesn’t want to be responsible for your happiness. (In fact, he might want to be free.)

Instead, show him by your actions that he can still be free when in a relationship with you.

Stop fantasying about him and start planning what you want to achieve with this sweet life of yours.

You might not get him back

This strategy might not work. He might not be the right man for you. But this strategy will make your life richer and better, there is really no way you can lose.

A final note on Am I overthinking or is he losing interest

If he says everything is fine, you have to trust him and take his word for it.

But the most important thing is that you trust yourself and the fact that you will be Ok without him. Right now you are paralyzed by the fear of losing him.

The truth is that you might lose him, maybe now, maybe in 10 years, but you need to always be working on being a strong confident person who can deal with whatever life throws at her.

This way you will always have inner peace