Signs he is fighting his feelings for you

Does he like you or not? The answer might surprise you

Love is complicated. We all want love. But many of us are also terrified of love. We try to protect our true feelings so as not to get hurt. We try to push back those feelings; we tell ourselves that we don’t like someone when we actually do like them. We do everything to fight our feelings. This article will give you the 5 biggest signs that he is fighting his feelings for you.

We will also tell you how to handle the situation.

The 5 top signs he is fighting his feelings for you

Going hot and cold is the most obvious sign that he is fighting his feelings for you. One day he is attentive; the next day, he ignores you.

If he is always around, even when he shouldn’t be, you can be sure that something is going on. How we spend our time is very telling of how we feel about things.

He tries to get closer to you

On top of this, you can check for the following signs; he is asking you personal questions, increasing the intimacy between the two of you, and displaying positive body language when he is around you. 

If you recognize these 5 signs, the truth is that he does like you, just as you suspected.

Why is he holding back?

For a lot of people, nothing is scarier than realizing that the person they like might like them back.

If we allow ourselves to love, we also allow ourselves to become extremely vulnerable.

His behavior might not be conscious

To love and to be rejected is incredibly painful.

This fear is both conscious and subconscious. Someone who withdraws from you might give you a whole lot of reasons. Such as that you are friends or work together or that they are not looking for someone right now.

He is afraid

But in fact, it’s not logic that guides them. It’s their subconscious screaming at them to get away. They are just too afraid to get hurt.

Some people are not ready to take the leap of fate necessary to fall in love and start a relationship. They are just too scared.

So they will act as if they are interested, but when things get a bit serious, they pull back.

He guards his feelings

You have probably heard that if a guy acts uninterested, well, then he is just not that into you.

This is true in most cases. But sometimes, someone can act completely uninterested and still secretly be in love with you.

They will give themselves away because our true feelings always shine through. I will give you all the signs that he is fighting his feelings for you.

1. He goes hot and cold

If a guy goes hot and cold, this is a clear sign that he is fighting with himself.

One part of him likes you and keeps pushing to get closer to you. He just can’t help himself.

When we like someone, we want more of that person. But at some point, he gets scared because of his feelings, and he acts uninterested. He doesn’t want you to know that he does indeed like you.

Find out if he likes you

Here you can check out How to tell if someone likes you.

A hot and cold guy is always, at some level, interested in you. The question you have to ask yourself is if you want to put up with someone afraid of love?

How to handle the situation?

The solution to this dilemma is to give him some time. But don’t give him too much time.

Because the answer in most cases will be that you will only hurt yourself and your self-esteem to try and “save” him from his fear of love.

Choose the right man

Men like to save women, but a lot of women like to try and save emotionally unavailable men.

If I gave you a choice between an emotionally available man and an emotionally unavailable man, who would you choose?

Exactly. Now go and make that choice in your real life as well.

2. He is always around

Action speaks louder than words.

This is especially true when it comes to romantic feelings.

If the guy in question always seems to be around, it’s a clear sign that he does like you. How we spend our time is very telling for the kind of person we are and how we really feel about things.

We put our time into the things we like. We just can’t help ourselves. Humans are actually really good at prioritizing things that are important to us.

He can’t help himself

Thus, the more he lingers in your company, or the more he keeps showing up in places where you are, the more he secretly likes you.

A guy who is interested in you will come up with all sorts of reasons why he needs to get closer to you.

He will become interested in your interest and start liking the restaurants and cafes where you often go.

His behavior might be subconscious

He will tell himself that he just has to go over to where you are, under the pretext to check on something. It’s important to know that this mechanism is both conscious and subconscious. He might not even be aware that he is always around you.

Keep your cool

That he keeps seeking your company is a good sign if you indeed want to win him over. Just play it cool and slowly get to know him better.

Don’t try and analyze his behavior too much. I have already told you; he does like you.

Read this article to find out exactly How to get someone to open up emotionally.

3. He is asking you personal questions

A guy who is fighting his feelings for you will most likely ask you personal questions.

When we like someone, we just can’t help ourselves. We want to find out more.

When a man likes a woman, everything about her becomes fascinating to him. He craves to get to know her better and get to know her on a deeper level.

He tries to impress you

By asking you personal questions, he gets to know your character. He also gets to know things you like and dislike, and he will happily store that information to try and impress you later on.

He remembers things about you

It’s also a sign that he is fighting his feelings for you if he pays attention to what you are telling him. If he, for example, refers back to things you said weeks ago, then you know that you are important to him.

If he remembers unimportant things or things you might have mentioned in passing, then he is interested in you.

He likes to listen to you

Another reason to ask personal questions is that they take a long time to answer.

The deeper the question, the longer time it takes to answer. That time he will be spending listening to you. He doesn’t mind if you talk for ten minutes nonstop. He likes listening to you.

4. He increases the intimacy between the two of you

 We have intimacy with our friends.

We tease them, we make inside jokes. We do things that we know will please them.

This is our way of showing them that we know them and that they have an important place in our lives. They mean something to us, and we mean something to them. We talk about the future, and we talk about past experiences.

He will tease you

A guy who is fighting his feelings for you will treat you in a similar way. He will tease you and try to establish inside jokes between the two of you. Basically, he will treat you with a bigger amount of intimacy than the situation calls for.

Different ways of increasing the intimacy

He will also say your name more often than what is normal. When we say someone’s name, we tie them a bit closer to us.

Everyone likes hearing their name, and your guy will instinctively know this and take advantage of this. When he says your name, what he says is that he wants your attention, and he wants it in a deep and special way.

He will refer back to things you previously talked about

He will also follow up on things that the two of you have been talking about.

Did you recommend a movie or a song? Next time he will bring it up and tell you his thoughts. This trick is especially neat since it brings the two of you closer together and gives you even more things to talk about.

So the two of you are friends, only you want more than friendship. Check out this article on How to get out of the friend zone with a guy.

5. Positive Body language

We can try and hide our true feeling, but our bodies will give us away.

We don’t fully control our bodies. When we like someone, we display what is called open body language. This is easy to spot. When we have open body language, our upper bodies are in sync with the person we are talking to.

His body is focused on you

We face each other. We look at each other intensely. You can feel his whole body angled towards you. It’s like his body is drinking you. He leans in when you say something.

When we like someone, we are comfortable being physically close with them. When a guy likes you, you will notice that he stands close to you.

Mirroring your body language

You will also notice that he mirrors your body language. You can test him on this by changing your body and seeing if he follows.

Friends also mirror each other’s and have open body language. But when we secretly like someone, we do it much more. It’s like our whole body, including our face and eyes, wants to get closer to them.

How to really know if he is fighting his feelings for you

All of the above signs that he is fighting his feelings for you are easy to spot. But you do have to try and establish a baseline.

You have to observe how he interacts with other people and, foremost other women.

You have to be sure that the way he treats you is different from how he treats other people.

Does his behavior towards you differ from how he treats other people?

Does he say your name a lot? Maybe he is a person who likes to use people’s names a lot? Does he touch your arm a lot? Check out if other women get the same treatment.

The more you find out about his behavior, the better you will become at noticing if he gives you special treatment.

You can also ask a friend to check for the signs that he is fighting his feelings for you.

The allure of the guy who is fighting his feelings for you

We all like a bit of a challenge. We feel like someone is worth more if we have to work hard to get them. Maybe we are afraid of real love and real commitment, and that’s why we “choose” to be interested in someone that doesn’t fully reciprocate our feelings.

Should you like him?

Whatever your reason for liking this guy, you have to question your behavior and feelings. Don’t let yourself get away with liking the wrong person for too long.

I know it’s tempting, especially when you meet someone you feel is truly special.

You probably feel like he gets you, and he knows how to make you laugh. Check out our article 10 signs of an emotionally unavailable man to know what to watch out for.

He will meet someone, why not you?

The allure of the emotionally unavailable man also stems from the fact that all those men, usually at one point or another, do settle down.

They do meet a woman who manages to crack their hard shell and melt their hearts.

You feel optimistic

There is a woman out there who will disassemble his well-guarded shield and manage to tap into his soul. This woman will go on to marry him and have children with him. Right now, you are hoping you might be this woman for your special guy.

He can be distant even in a relationship

But there is another aspect you have to take into consideration. You can be emotionally unavailable even in a relationship.

Maybe she will be happy, maybe they both will be happy.

But someone emotionally unavailable doesn’t just wake up one day a changed man. Don’t become so tangled up in the allure of the chase that you end up choosing the wrong man.

A Final Note

What I want to give you with this text is closure.

Right now, you are preoccupied with two questions: Does he like me? How can I make him like me even more?

But none of those questions is the right question.

He does like you. You can probably make him like you even more.

I have written many articles about how to do exactly that. Check out my article How to make someone fall in love with you.

Is he enough?

But that he does like you is not enough. You can’t build a future on the fact that he does indeed like you.

Be kind to yourself and your feelings. Being attracted to someone is a beautiful thing. Your ability to feel is something you should celebrate.

Don’t give him too much time

Be generous enough to give this guy some time. But absolutely not more than three months. (Three weeks is also sufficient.) You don’t want to waste your precious love on someone who doesn’t take things to the next level.

The question you should be asking yourself is:

Is what he offers what I’m looking for?

If the answer is no, it’s time to move on.