How to have more sex

Tips and ideas for all the single women out there 

Are you feeling frustrated? Not having a blast being single and dating around? Not getting any sex? Yeah, the reality is not exactly as fun as being single is portrayed in TV shows. We are not promising to turn your life into a Sex and the City episode, but if you follow our advice, you will improve your chances of having more sex this year.

How to proceed

You need to meet more men to get more options. Also, try not to dismiss those men too quickly. Step away from the idea that you have a designated type.

Try viewing sex like something less special and instead as a natural part of your life.

Find the right wing-woman to help you on your mission.  

The ups and downs of sex

Sex can be a wide range of different things; it can be mediocre, awful, or something done while drunk and desperate and instantly regretted the next morning.

But let’s all agree on one thing, the right kind of sex feels amazing. And that’s the kind of sex we all wish to have more of this year.

Sex is healthy

The right kind of sex boosts your self-confidence and makes you float a couple of centimeters above the ground. Sex gives you a healthy glow and floods your body with pleasurable hormones such as oxytocin.

Most people want more sex

Most people I know, both single and in relationships, would like to have more sex. But life gets in the way, stress and work and a thousand other projects get in the way.

The sex ends up taking a backseat.

If you are single, there is the added obstacle of finding someone to have sex with. Someone you actually want to have sex with. This someone also has to want to jump into the sack with you.

Mission: impossible?

Achieving all this is oftentimes close to mission impossible. Some of us are horrified to discover that yet another year has rushed by and we haven’t had sex a single time.

This article, full of tips on how to have more sex this year, is for all the single ladies out there.

1. Meet more men

To have more sex this year, you simply need to meet more men.

There is no way around this point.

How many new men you meet in any given week directly correlates to your chances of having more sex. You will not meet someone you are attracted to if you meet zero new people.

Meet new men

Not every man in your life qualifies as a new man.

By a new man, I mean someone you didn’t know before.

I also mean that you will actually have to have a conversation with these men.

Spend five minutes getting to know him

The conversation should be a minimum of five minutes.

You should try to make it personal and connect with the man in question.

Want to become better at creating sexual chemistry with the men you do meet? Check out How to flirt with a man.

And please, don’t dismiss him too fast.

Not everyone is a natural-born Casanova.

He can still be a nice person and good in bed.

2. Switch up your routine

To keep track of what’s going on in your life, take a couple of weeks and count how many new men you meet every week, meeting the criteria above. Write down your statistics on your phone.

Try and break your number from the week before.

The best way to meet a good number of new men is to switch up your routine. What you have been doing so far is clearly not working.

Put yourself out there

So without any further due, get out of your apartment. Hunt the internet for fun, exciting things going on in your city.

Start chatting with strangers.

Have 5-minute conversations

Everything to get to those desirable five-minute conversations with a completely new man.

Say yes to random invitations you get, those things you normally would have turned down without a second thought. You will meet more men. Somewhere down the line; you might discover that you are having fun.

3. Change how you view sex

For a lot of women, sex is a very emotional experience.

We don’t go around and hand out sex to random men. That’s not in our DNA.

We want him to be someone smart and funny and sexy and crazy about us. But these impossibly high standards keep us from having sex.

Knock sex of the pedestal

To have more sex this year, you have to knock down sex a bit.

You have to be prepared to give it away to someone slightly less deserving.

Take him for a test drive

You might not feel super attracted to him. If he seems decent, try a make-out session. You might become more attractive to him by engaging in an erotic situation.

You don’t have to go all the way; just test the waters.

Sex can also be simple

Sex is an act of love.

I know it’s hard to step away from that mindset.

But sex is also something we all need to feel alive; sex is spiritual, but it’s also prosaic. It’s like food, exercise or taking a shower.

View sex as something natural

Try viewing sex like something less special, something your body needs and thus something you should work towards giving your body, without putting too much value on the act itself.

Since your rarely get laid, you start to view sex as more special than it is, and you wait for the right person to come along and blow you away. By having more sex, you will open yourself up to even more sex.

If you want to regard sex in a different light; here is an article about How to make a man cry in bed.

4. Lower your standards

It sounds like a terrible idea, and as something you shouldn’t do.

Lowering your standard goes against every piece of advice you’ve heard so far in your life. And that’s why you should give it a try.

Who knows, all those people might have been wrong, and you might end up enjoying your new adventures.

We worry about giving the wrong impression

If you don’t try, you will never know. When it comes to sex, a lot of women judge men too hard.

We worry too much about the consequence. Sometimes we worry too much about how we will come across. Will someone find out and think we are a slut?

Try someone who isn’t your type

If your standard is that you don’t like men who are too short, or men that are too old or too young, it’s time to lower your standard.

If you only like men with dark hair and brown eyes, try something else from the menu. Do me one favor and try to kiss a man you normally would dismiss as “not your kind of guy.”

Why you should lower your standards

We happily wrote a whole article about the benefits of lowering your standards to get laid, and exactly how to proceed to lower your standard the right way. Should you lower your standards to get laid?

Broaden your horizon

If you haven’t already, you should try online dating. I could have mentioned this tip above when I talked about how you need to meet more men, but it’s oddly suitable to put it under the headline Broaden your horizon.

Be open when online dating

Whit online dating, you will meet a lot of different men, most of whom will not be your type.

This is an excellent opportunity to practice lowering your standards.

If you have already done your fair share of online dating, go ahead and take a break, and focus on just living your life, doing things you consider fun.

5. Get a Wingwoman

If you are not having enough sex, the reason can be something as simple as the fact that you are not spending enough time with single people.

This easily happens when you have the same friend for a long period of time. Your friends meet someone and all of a sudden, your social calendar is busy with weddings and baby showers.

Spend time with other single people

The more single people you include in your life, the more fun you will have.

Whatever you do, don’t say yes to couple dinners and similar useless events where you will be the only single person. You don’t have much free time and if you want to meet more men, you have to prioritize.

Or a wingman

Your first step towards having more sex this year should be to find girlfriends in the same situation.

Together you can go out and find men where they hang out, such as at sporting events or sports bars. Don’t underestimate getting your own adrenaline rushing by doing sports like rock climbing or surfing.

You should also try and find male friends who are single. They are usually interested in doing things (other than couple dinners) and know a lot of other single men.

6. Just start

Or, as the Nike slogan goes, just do it.

To overcome a mental blockage, the thing you sometimes have to do is to dive in headfirst.

Thinking and analyzing can only get you so far. You have to push the doubt and the thoughts to the side and be brave.

We keep on waiting

The main thing with this point is to be more aggressive when it comes to men. Take the initiative to start talking, to ask for a number, to kiss him. Far too often, we wait around. We wait for the man to make a move, to call us, to fall in love with us.

Don’t fear rejection

We are afraid of rejection. But a lot of times, rejection is the best thing that can happen to you.

A rejection forces you to move on.

Rejection teaches you that life goes on. I can guarantee you will be braver the next time.

Make the first move

Use social media such as Facebook and Instagram to connect with more men. If someone seems interesting, just send him a message and see how it goes.

Wondering exactly what to ask, here are our guide How to make the first move on a guy.

Go ahead; this is your chance

Social media have the added advantage that it’s fairly easy to figure out if someone is single or not.

Don’t get hanged upon one man. Women are wired to want to meet the one, both by society and by something deep in our biology.

Take my word on this; you will meet the one. We all do, sooner or later. And when we do, we often regret that we didn’t enjoy being single.

Dont aim at meeting “The One”

When it comes to having more sex this year, meeting the one is an obstacle that keeps you from getting laid. Your aim should be to meet plenty of men. Different kinds of men, fun men, stupid men, shy men, and to sleep with more of them.

Here is an interesting article about how different women handle sex and singlehood.

Keep the motivation going

If you did everything above and the result still is not what you had hoped for, be patient.

Take care of yourself. Talk nice to yourself and celebrate the victories you do have.

Rome wasn’t built in one day.

Building a portfolio of men you find reasonably attractive takes some time. Keep on following the formula above.

Enjoy your erotic side

If you want to have more sex this year, don’t overlook sex with yourself.

Read erotic literature and watch exciting movies. See if you can get horny without the involvement of the ever-elusive right man.

This approach will make you more in tune with your erotic side. This will make you view more men as possible prospects.

You will also give away a more erotic vibe.

So, in the end, being erotic with yourself can open up the possibility to have more sex this year.